So Why Would You Need a Life Coach?

by Michael Vander Donk Associate Trainer of NLP Inspiritive Life Coach

When I'm at a party or some other function, people usually ask me what I do. When I tell them I'm a Life Coach, one of the first things they ask is, "what is that?" This is a great question to learn about what I do. The other day I was asked a similar question: "what can you do for me?" At the time I was stunned by the question. It is simple, yet reaching. The question asks both what is a Life Coach and what life coaching can do. In the next few pages, I will attempt to answer this question.

When you first arrive at a gym and organise a trainer, the trainer usually talks with you to discover your goals. You might want to get fit, or to win a body building contest or anything in between. As a Life Coach I also do this. I need to understand what you want in order to help you get it. Quite often however, people do not have their goals formatted in a useful way. Other times they do but lack the skills to achieve the goal. As a Life Coach I can teach you some of the best ways to build and then achieve the goals you want.

Every time I take on a new client, we sit down and discuss the goals and aspirations the client has. We discuss what they expect of me and what I expect from them. The client will be responsible for doing the things that need to get done, for doing their 'homework' so to speak. The client will be required to make the decisions. I can assist in the decision, pointing out options or issues, but I can't and not willing to make decisions that effect your life and business. You need to commit to your life without abdication. Coming to a life coach is a step in this process, but definitely not the last.

I'm exposed to many different people with different ways of doing the same or similar things. Often I'm asked, "Is this the right way?" The only answer I can give to this is, "Does it work for you as well as you want it to?" If it does work, great, it's a right way, but probably not the only 'right' way. If not, then a Life Coach can help you find ways to be enhance these skills, enabling you to do what you want to do efficiently and effectively. As a Life Coach I can examine these methods and offer possible improvements.

If there is something that you can't do yet a Life Coach can train you in different ways to achieve this skill. Think of it like going to the gym. You can turn up in your shorts and shirt, sit on the bench press and lift weights all day long. Doing this, you have to learn via trial and error the best way to build your strength. If you had access to a personal trainer, they have already done this research and are able to train you to achieve faster and more effective muscle building. A Life Coach is similar, but with a different focus. Just as a physical trainer spends much time learning about the human body, how it works, and how it doesn't, a Life Coach learns how we think and manage ourselves to help you achieve what you want. The coaches I work with are Master NLP practitioners. Most are also trained in hypnotherapy. From different walks of life, and with very different experience, coupled with NLP technology they can help you achieve. If there is something the coach is not trained in, or has no experience with, they have access to a solid group of other Life Coaches to learn and cross train with. I update my skills at the very least every 3 months. Finding out what has worked the best, and what hasn't. If a situation occurs which I am unable to help you with, I will say so. I am not perfect, I do not know everything. I will however attempt to assist you in finding someone who can assist, someone who does have the skills you need.

While the Life Coach can do a lot for you, there are limits to their skill. A Life Coach can teach you how to make better, more effective decisions, help you decide on which decision to take. They can offer a solid support network to enable you to make these decisions and discuss different options with you that move you forward towards your goal. They can not make critical choices for you. It is your life after all.

Secondly, a Life Coach is not a therapist. We want you to be better, more successful, happier. We therefore want to concentrate on what you want, rather than fixing only the problems. Although some coaches are trained in counselling, hypnosis and other therapeutic methods, they are not there to fix historical problems. You would be better served going to a professional therapist. If, however, you want to build a better, richer and more fulfilling life, then a Life Coach can help.

Finally, a Life Coach is not a friend. You are paying them your hard-earned money. They are committed to helping you achieve what you want. At times they need to make a hard choice and tell you things you may not want to hear. A friend, as we all know, is sometimes afraid to tell us what we do not want to hear.

In the gym, the coach pushes you for that one more lift, just one more. That single lift can be hard, seemingly impossible. However, your coach knows you can do it, they also know the results you want are easier and closer when you do just one more. They know that one lift makes a two-week difference. If you want it easy, that can be arranged, but if you want the most out of your Life Coach, and out of life, sometimes you need to lift just one more.

This shows some of the things that I can do for you, and some of the things I can't. This as I'm sure you can appreciate does not cover everything I can do with you. It covers the main points, and gives you a good idea on what is involved when working with a Life Coach.

Michael Vander Donk is an Inspiritive Life Coach. He has a Graduate Certificate in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Ericksonian Hypnosis certification. He also attended Steve Gilligan's Ericksonian Hypnosis and the Generative Self in 1999.